I know, I know. There's no such thing as a vegan Paleo diet. Without beans, wheat & lentils, we vegans would die — probably in the back cooler of a Whole Foods as we weakly called out for a lump of tofu. Then that guy who Stephen Colbert interviewed would come collect our lifeless carcass, butcher us, and store us in his chest freezer for a good month's worth of grass-fed meat.

Butchery aside, I have committed to try the Paleo diet and see how I fare as a vegan who is actively training to be a stronger weightlifter. It's not perfectly Paleo, I admit, but it's as close as I can get. I'm following all the rules except the one about soybeans. In fact, I have committed to reducing my major sources of protein to only soybeans so that I am only breaking one rule, keeping me as close to an authentic Paleo diet as possible under my circumstances. Think of it as roughly comparable to the guy who keeps a Paleo diet but refuses to give up the nightly beer or two. Except I'm not a guy. And I don't drink beer.

What I am is a person who is really effing sick of people telling me that I will not thrive on a vegan diet. For the past decade, I've managed to not only stay alive and healthy, but perform athletic feats that my friends think are insane. I'm the girl who gets asked to flex her biceps at parties. Yet, I'm unsatisfied. I want to be leaner. I want to be able to speak knowledgeably about the diet to clients, both veg*n and omnivore. Most of all, I'd really like to shock the hell out of people by making major strength gains on a vegan Paleo diet.

So for the next two months, 6 days a week, I'll be eating Paleo. I'm allowing myself a once-a-week cheat day, but I hope to not stray too far. My husband (also vegan) has agreed to get in on the action for two months. I'd like to say he agreed graciously, but the fact is, he was dragged kicking and screaming into this. I'm doing my best to keep meals exciting and non-repetitive to stop him from killing me in my sleep. Here are a few recipes we've enjoyed over the past few days.

Cauliflower and Roasted Parsnip Mash

This mash is creamy thanks to the coconut milk, and dreamy thanks to the parsnips.

• 4-6 skinny parsnips
• Medium sized head of cauliflower
• 4 tablespoons of coconut milk
• 1 tablespoon extra virgin olive oil

Peel and cut parsnips into small strips. Toss in olive oil. Lay on a baking sheet and roast at 400°F for 20 minutes.

Cut cauliflower into florets and steam until tender.

Combine parsnips, cauliflower, and coconut milk in a food processor and blend until smooth. You can add more or less coconut milk until you achieve your desired consistency.

Makes enough mash for 2 - 4 people.

Almost Paleo Chocolate Pistachio Truffles

I'm not a date fan, but these little balls of awesome won me over. Divine

• 3/4 cup medjool dates, pits removed
• 1/4 cup Rumi's Sesame Pistachio Hempspread (available here)
• 2 tablespoons raw cacao powder
• 2 tablespoons coconut milk

Throw everything into a food processor, blend until mixed well. Roll with your hands into tiny balls and refrigerate until firm. You could also roll these in the raw cacao or desiccated coconut.

The "almost" is because the Rumi's product contains agave.

Makes about 12 truffles.

Almost Paleo Chocolate Almond Goo

This decadent concoction tastes a lot like brownie batter. You can add more tofu to make pudding, or less to make truffles.

• 3/4 cup medjool dates
• 4 tablespoons firm silken tofu
• 3 tablespoons raw cacao powder
• 2 tablespoons coconut milk
• 2 tablespoons smooth ground almond butter
• 2 teaspoons vanilla extract

Blend all ingredients in a food processor until smooth. You may have to scrape down the sides with a spatula several times. Spoon into tiny jars and refrigerate.

The "almost" here is due to the tofu and possibly the vanilla, but I do have to mention that the vanilla extract I used was handmade by a very crafty friend!

Makes about 6 tiny jars.

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